When Your Mind Sabotages Your Dreams: Turning Your Critical Internal Voices into Collaborative Allies (Mediate Your Life: A Guide to Removing Barriers to Communication Book 3) by Ike Lasater & John Kinyon & Julie Stiles

Author:Ike Lasater & John Kinyon & Julie Stiles [Lasater, Ike]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Nonfiction
Publisher: Global Reach Books
Published: 2017-10-19T22:00:00+00:00

✦Coaching you

✦Advising you with solutions about how you can do it better next time

✦Consoling you: “It’s okay, you’ll do better next time.”

✦Being a cheerleader: “You can do it! I know you can!”

For our purposes, we suggest that instead of the above list, you ask that your partner give you empathy. This involves looking into the need you were seeking to meet with the choice you made instead of keeping the agreement. If your partner is not well versed in empathy as we’re using it, then request that they ask you a question to prompt you to reflect on this for yourself, such as, “What need were you meeting when you did _____ instead of keeping the agreement?”

After you receive empathy, you may find that you desire and are open to one of the more typical roles listed above. Likewise, if you find you’d like some more ideas about what you can try next time, you can ask for suggestions. It’s rare that anyone wants coaching, solutions, or advice before they receive empathy, so with restoring agreements that include other people, always err on the side of requesting empathy.

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